O Ugly O

Ohio, according to Wikipedia is a midwestern state and possibly the deciding factor in the 2004 presidental election. Both are debatable. One thing is for sure. This recent trip was my first to Ohio. Shamoopie was hungry as soon as we got off the plane. I mean growl in your face pregnant hungry. So as soon as we got to our rental car I found her some lunch. We found a Panera Bread at a mall near the airport.

It was your usual Panera Bread. Nothing special but it was clean and we know the menu. We got our food and sat down to eat. As we were eating I was looking around and I asked Shamoopie was it just me or were the people there really ugly? She informed me that it was not me and that yes in fact that the people in the Panera Bread were in fact some the the ugliest people in America. Purhaps the world. Most of them looked like Springer rejects. We chuckled about it, ate our food, and went on our merry way. During our trip I kept noticing that there were a disproportional amount of ugly people in Ohio. More so than in other states that I have visited. Maybe it was just the area we were in around Cleveland. Maybe but I don't think so.

Now our friends there are good looking people. Damize and his family should move. By Ohio standards they are super models. They are a good looking family.

I am proposing that Ohio stop false advertising and change it's name to Ouglyo. I am thinking that as immigrants got off the boat at Ellis Island they were divided into groups. One good looking that was sent all over the country and one of ugly people that were all sent to Ohio. I can see it now as they were in line. "You..Pennsylvania, you..New York, ewww you...Ohio. You look like an Ohio to me." It's the only explanation that I can come up with. It may not be true. But it's all I have to explain what I saw.

Things like this:

Everywhere we went.








I rest my case.