Don't ask...just don't

Sometimes even asking nicely isn't enough. People might be having a bad day or they just might be mean people. I am not sure witch is the case but when I met Andy Summers from the band Police a few years ago he well...

The Police were not together at the time. There were no rumors of them getting together. This, even thou Stewart Copeland was at the same show and he was very nice. A friend of mine (Damize) and I were at a Summer NAMM show. It's the National Association of Musical Merchants show that takes place twice a year. We happened to be at one in Nashville. I recognized Andy Summers. Damize thought that is was not him but I walked up to him and asked if he was and he said yes that he was indeed Andy Summers.

I then asked Damize to hold my camera and I turn to Mr. Summers and asked him if I could get my picture taken with him. He looked up at me and said "No FCUK OFF". I have cleaned it up but only a little. I was not sure if I heard him correctly so I asked him again and he repeated himself..."No FCUK OFF" and walked away.

To make a long story shorter. I never got my picture and the Police are getting back together for a world tour this year. Shamoopie and I are both fans. We have tickets that we got from Damize and we are going with him and his wife to the show in his home town.

The media have picked up on the fact that the Police are back together and they have put Mr. Summers on the cover of magazines. One such magazine is Guitar Player. Being a guitar player I happen to subscribe to that magazine. Andy was on the cover of a recent issue.

Shamoopie being the sweet and wonderful person she is met me at the door with the magazine covering her lovely face and followed me all around the house yelling ...."No FCUK OFF". Got I love that woman! She only stopped when I told her that I knew she wasn't Andy Summers because she was way too tall. :) Remember how he had to look up at me. He is a little on the short side. Later.

Ebay will make you gay...

Well maybe it won't make you gay. But it might make you laugh or crazy or both. This crazy german guy is a genius. He buys this mandolin from a store on ebay. The thing is obviously a piece of crap. He documents it's crappyness very well in the listing. He lists it back on ebay and says where he bought it from and puts an outrageous price on it so it won't sell. Titles the add "Piece of Junk". This guy is my new hero.

For the price of the listing, he has placed a really bad add on ebay for all to see. And it will run forever for that price until someone buys it. Genius. I wish I was that smart.

The reason for the blog ...Steven Seagal

Shamoopie and I are watching TV the other night and there is this Steven Seagal (SS) movie on. The movie was called "Fire Down Below". Now the movie being your typical SS movie. SS plays Jack Taggart your typical EPA employee. I used to contract with the EPA and I remember all the employees acting like Steven. The movie is your typical guy flick. It had your fighting and your shooting, your arm breaking and general ass kickin. All the better for me. I am down with all of that. Shamoopie is ok ith it every now and again.

What you didn't expect was the singin. Yep SS is a singer and a guitar player. He has a guitar collection. Go to his website and read it for yourself. SS is also a song writer also. He has songs like "Alligator Ass" and "Talk to my ass". Basically he's got your ass covered in song.


So I was looking at his website after watching some of the videos and almost dying. He makes the statement that he has played with Howling Wolf. So on the website there are pictures of SS all over the place he has one of him with a Panda. When I saw the picture of SS with the panda I lost it. It looks like he's talking to it. Telling it things like..."I am going to rub you like this" and "Then I am going to touch you like that" and "now I am going to stick it in your..." well you get the idea. Maybe he was just talking to his ass? Maybe.


I just couldn't hold back anymore. I had to tell someone besides Shamoopie. So now I will blog when I find these things.

First Entry Fancy Pants

So...my wife has been bugging me to start my own blog. I finally have something that I want to blog about and she "trys" to help me set it up. She does a great job. There was nothing wrong with anything she did (trying a little cya here more about my shamoopie later). But there was a problem.

The problem came when we try to pick a name. That was the problem. I wanted one of my favorite sayings "Fancy Pants and Plans to Match" to be it the blog name or for it be part of my email. Try to create an email on any system with fancy pants in it. You can't. Every version of the name is taken. So I am stuck with plans2match.